When my daughter was born, we weren’t sure what to do about a baptism. We had just started going back to church right before we got married and decided to have our wedding there. We were both raised Catholic; baptized and received all the other sacraments growing up. We knew it would probably make our families happy and we also wanted some kind of ceremony to welcome her into the world and our community. We each only had one sibling so choosing the godparents was no problem, but my sister lived on the other side of the country at the time and so we had to schedule an event during a time when she was visiting. While most babies were being baptized as newborns, Ellie was almost 18 months by the time we got it all figured out.
And then there was the hiccup.
In speaking to the church about our godparents, they told us that my sister, Christine, couldn’t “officially” be recognized as a godmother because she had never received the sacrament of confirmation. My husband’s brother, Bob, was confirmed and since only one godparent was required for the ceremony, they said we could go ahead with just him. But that was really disappointing. The point of a godparent, in my eyes, was not only the spiritual role, but also about trusting someone with your child should anything happen to you. And putting aside the morbid aspect of it for a moment, I knew my sister was someone who was going to be really invested in my daughter’s life.
Before she was even born, Christine was sending Ellie post cards and writing her “dear baby” letters. Almost 10 years later, Christine now lives local, and she’s the one who picks Ellie up, takes her to museums, hiking, the art store and spends the day drawing and hanging out with her. How could anyone tell her she wasn’t qualified to be a godparent?
At the time, I didn’t know that secular baby naming ceremonies was a thing I could do. I didn’t find out about them until I was an officiant and other celebrant friends told me about this other service they offered. I wish I had known there was another option. It would have been nice to craft something all our own — to be able to get that moment of introducing our child to the world, with family and community support and publicly recognize the godparents of our choice – both of them.
Now entering my fourth season as a wedding officiant, creating Naming Ceremonies is my next mission. I want to work with families who are welcoming a new child into their lives through personal ceremony and community. Whether celebrating a first born, a new sibling, or even an adopted child, ceremony and ritual can be a great way to start this wonderful new chapter for you all.
Naming ceremonies aren't just for babies. They can be used to unite a blended family under one common surname or celebrate a trans gender individual's new identity.
Just as I have helped couples celebrate their love story on their wedding day, I can't wait to be there for this moment, too. Together, we'll craft a celebration that’s unique and meaningful to you that incorporates everyone you want to be a part of it, with no limits or restrictions.
I respect all religions and faiths. While I do not regret having my child baptized, I also understand that it's not for everyone and it leaves many left out and underserved. If having a naming ceremony would be important to, I'd really like to speak to you and discover how I can help!
Find more info on the Naming Ceremony page or send me and email anytime!
All my best!